That WFAA piece of non-news posing as a shocking expose’ I mentioned in the previous post proved to be such a rich source of mock fodder that my pointer finger got tired before I could give every worthy item a proper taunting.

Speaking as a former journalist, would you like to know when a reporter has ceased objectively reporting the facts of a story and begun ax-grinding and agenda flogging? It is the moment you hear a phrase like “envelopes stuffed with cash” to describe business reply letters containing checks for product purchases and donations. Reporter Brett Shipp says:

Among those who have come forward is Jeff Spradlin, who said he grew up admiring the Copelands and was excited to get a job working for them.

“Within 90 days, I started realizing this was a huge mistake,” he said.

For nearly two years, Spradlin said he worked in the mail processing center where prayer request envelopes stuffed with cash would arrive every morning.

That phrase “come forward” is an especially nice touch to describe the three cranky ex-employees of the ministry. It makes them sound so courageous. After all, the last guy that crossed those Copelands never got work in a mail room in this town again.

I have been in several dozen ministry “mail processing centers” and I can attest that an envelope containing any cash is very rare. And I have never seen one “stuffed with cash.” Nevertheless, using that phrase makes it sound like some sort of shady money-laundering, white-slavery operation. Which was precisely the objective.

One striking thing about the three brave ex-employees is that their primary complaint seems to be a disappointing quantity of hang time with Ken and Glo.

The former employees News 8 spoke to also said their spirits sank after learning the Copelands have little if any contact with their Prayer Partners and their staff.

“The one time I saw the man was at the Christmas party,” Boutwell said.

This sort of disappointment is not uncommon. People who connect with a minister through television and conferences come to work for a ministry such as KCM with wildly unrealistic expectations about what it is going to be like and the levels of access they are going to enjoy.

Finally, the report is amusingly bewildered and scandalized by the concept of “personalizing” letters through automation. 

I was nervious at first but I feel better now that I have “come forward” to “speak out” about the abuses of investigative reporting.